What do men think about during sex?

Trust me, every woman has wondered about this at some point in their life. Are they thinking about me or fantasizing about someone else. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t just a little bit curious. Let’s uncover this mystery that has been puzzling women worldwide.

“Is this really happening?”

For some men, not all men, this might be the first thought to enter their mind. For those with a steady partner, it might be a regular occurrence. However, for others, who may not be sexually active on a regular basis, it can be quite exciting.

“Don't come, don't come, don't come! Just a little longer!”

The most common thought during sex is trying not to cross the finish line too early. A large number of men are worried about premature ejaculation. No male wants to disappoint their partner and this is high up on the list of sexual anxieties. Vaginal sex, on average, lasts about 6 minutes. Some men try and distract themselves with math problems or other topics to prevent early ejaculation. 

“How do I look/sound?”

Is sex always sexy? The truth is it usually isn’t. Men are self-conscious too, and they do wonder how they appear during sex. Am I making the right faces, am I too loud? Should I try to dirty talk or is it just better to be quiet? Men don’t know what their partners’ like. Their main aim is to please not repulse.

“Should we try some butt stuff?”

Anal sex is on the rise right now. In the US, according to the National Health Statistics Report on Sexual Behaviour, Sexual Attraction and Sexual Identity in the US, 37% of women and 45% of men have had at least one anal sex experience with an opposite-sex partner. Men are definitely curious, but are they confident enough to ask?

“Is that an orgasm?”

Sometimes it can be difficult to know when a woman has an orgasm. Men want to make sure they please but there is no right way to ask a woman if she has enjoyed herself. Sex isn’t always about having an orgasm. It can be just as fun without one.

“What/where is the clitoris?”

We can all agree that female sexual anatomy is a lot more complicated than the male counterpart. All vaginas are different. The complexity of the vagina usually brings about a lot of confusion to men. It can take time to find it through exploration with the hands or tongue. Be patient and explore. Use your partner’s reaction to help guide you in the right direction. Or even better, ask her to help you as women know themselves better. It never hurts to ask.

When done right, sex is beautiful, wonderful and fantastic. Take your time and be confident.